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Friends Only [09 May 2010|12:47am]
FIY:This journal has been friends only for a couple years now. Add me if you want, but say hi and comment! I update pretty regularly and have started to post some tips and inspiration stuffs for weight-loss and healthy eating =]
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good morning [01 Nov 2008|12:57pm]
[ mood | shocked ]

147.6lbs this morning?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

HOWWWWWW!!?!?!?

i love positive emotions, they seem to melt the pounds.

shit, my goal is only to lose 2.6 pounds from right here!@!

well ok, +5

so really 7.6, but that's my LIFE goal, i don't think i've ever weighed that low...or have i

doodeedooooooo

have a good day everyone
i can't believe that i quit 28 day plan!!

maybe i'll do another one, maybe not, it has a lot of negative effects on my self esteem sometimes :(

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guess what [29 Oct 2008|12:14pm]
this morning i was at 151.0

fuck.

still very sick.

i wonder how much i can lose in 2 days.

:(

but i dont want to try and lose because i am sick and i just want to relax and do everything to make myself better.

i'm a fail.

fail i tell you.

i want to be ok with being how i am....the only BIG problem is my skin looking worse than ever int he past week.
that's worse than fat.
and it's harder to deal with.
although when i'm healthy, my skin is also.
so i'm pretty much screwed for my deadline and impressing douchebag.
guess my charm will have to do.
i had a dream that we got married but he was strange and douchy and i almost regretted it.

good morning world.
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blah [23 Oct 2008|12:37pm]
been so tired lately.
last night i had a...bowel...issue...haha not to TMI but i decided to eat some more to keep my stomach to feel like it was exploding into itself.
that made me feel a bit shitty [ah. hah. hah. hah.] but my stomach felt better so i justified it.
today i already feel gross.

140 cals i ate a fiber far thing in the morning becase my stomach still felt weird
70 cals light and fit smoothie yogurt thinggie
80 cals some almonds
----
280 so far. not bad, but i feel so gross and have not had any water. maybe i will.
i'm in typography right now and had a pretty good morning- a presentation, SALSA IS NEXT! kind of excited but tired...
i'm feeling really stressed because all these things have piled up to do and i can't seem to keep track of them =[
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day 11 [22 Oct 2008|10:19pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

So I feel like setting a goal. My first hit will be two weeks in 3 days and I have decided I want to have lost 6 pounds. That means I have to lose 1.6 pounds in 3 days. I feel like it's possible but I also wouldn't be sad if it is only 1.1 pound and I am at 5.5ish or just more than 5 so i'm losing just over 2 pounds a week. The weird part is that I lost around 3-4 pounds during the first 3 days and then it started to go really slow. bleh. i AM losing though, just have to keep telling myself that. Ive been doing lots of photoshoots with myself and have been liking them :) maybe i'll post a photo or something...I just really want to wait until 2 weeks and then i will def do a before/after thinggie. sooo....

GOAL:
On Saturday weigh between 146.8 - 147.5

OFFICIAL STATS:

day 11 | 4.4lbs | 90/110

was 152.8
now 148.4 
scared about tomorrow morning, i don't feel like the scale will be lower :(
tomorrow will be another day like yesterday, more restriction.
maybe i'll try veggies only or something, but so far i've been trying to not eat so many carbs.

Food 2/2
daily plate says:
Our estimate is that you may consume about 1,525 calories a day to lose two pounds per week.
today i ate around 800-900, so i am under. plus i restricted a lot, minus the coffee drink, but i was falling asleep and NEVER drink coffee.

Water 2/2

i could have done better but i drank a lot of tea today and other drinks besides water. i feel like it was a big liquid day so i get 2 points.

Exercise 2/2
i did hula hoop today and walked a lot when i didn't have to. i will do some more exercise in a bit after my food has settled down more. never give up! we have people staying with us so i can't go freka out downstairs sadly.

Journaling/Posting 2/2
here i am.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
i tried to be nice. i really wanted to compliment this girls outfit and this other girl's shoes but failed. it's ok, i thought it though and smiled instead. i took my grandparents out so that was nice :)

so i honestly don't feel like i deserved a 10/10 because i feel like i just ate like a pig but i have to keep reminding myself that i NEED to eat and rewarding myself for not eating ANY sweets today! i had about a bazillion chances and i walked away, so go me
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good morning [22 Oct 2008|02:04pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

finally, a bit down. i do like my digital scale, it is motivating when you see 0.0s come off too, not just kind of squint at the scale and hope it maybe looks less...

i was 148.4 grrr wanna get down to 147 so baddd

down form 152.8 = 4.4....almost 5!

come to think of it over the last month i have been up to 154, maybe even 156 so that's pretty damn good.

i ate a slimfast bar today, no idea where i got it from, i was laying around my room....140 cals, but healthy and lots of vitamins in there
then i was SO hungry and i ate an apple [i hate apples too, funny, but it was so pretty looking!] (~65 cals) and then there was a bunch of food out for our guests, cheese and meat and stuff, so i had a slice of mozzarella cheese, the soft kind, with a slice of meat and some cherry tomatoes. i belive according to the cheese box that it was around 80 cals for the peice i ate and add in a handful more.... oh and a tiny piece of chicken breast from yesterday. not bad i suppose, although i don't feel empty, but that is ok...keep that metabolism goin!
140
65
80
100
---
385

ugh that's not the best...but it's not a lot at all.

the day is just getting started! i need more fruits/veggies, taking  a pear to school. and lots of tea!

i've also cut sweets out, which is the hardest thing ever for me. i always need a tiny peice of something sweet to calm down, but i'm only eating it if i REALLY REALLY need it, which i do sometimes. it's just that if you eat a little peice, then your body wants more and starts some strange glucose processes that my mom was telling me about, but sugar is everywhere! i'm about to go have some tea with sugar.

ok byebye have a good day =]
 


 


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day 10 babies. [21 Oct 2008|11:08pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

so it's weird because i had 85 points last 28 day plan on day 10 but i think i was just trying to stay motivated and not fucking up on the food and water part as much. i've been a little more strict this time i think. i also broke the past few days which didn't help. ummmmmm what else.....i can't wait to weigh in tomorrow, i've lost 2 pound more than before and i hope i can finally go down to 148 tomorrow. and 145 by the 30th when douchbag comes! muahah! he's going to ink his pants when he sees me.

OFFICIAL STATS-------
day 10 | 4.0lbs | 80/100
[not bad....a B-, worse than i was doing before but lost way more weight already]

was 152.8
now 148.8 (not weighing in today, will weigh in tomorrow morning from a great day!)

Food 2/2
i am bombdiggity. today i ate:

-breakfast: a bite of bagel
-lunch: 2 handfuls of almonds
-snack: soy latte and 1/4th of a bagel
-dinner: some white chicken breast and a crab stick
----------
~800-900 cals

i feel really really good today because this food was very well spread out and i didn't have ANYTHING extra.
i controlled myself and wasn't even hungry at all. i could have not even eaten anything, but i don't want to slow my metabolism down!
it helped not being home and being in an extremely great mood...it happens when i'm alone and thinking usually and not feeling yucky about my body, which has been a great trend. having a great set of classes and homework i love doing also helps. ya'll should try it!
sorry i'm so enthusiastic, although no, no i'm not. just spreadin the love.

wow

Water 2/2

did drink a lot

Exercise 2/2
still sore but i had my salsa class in which i wore something skin tight for the first time all quarter. I was really self consious and didn't dance well because of this...but it was nice to start getting used to this. I just didn't expect my freaking hips to look HUGUNGOUS, although my waist looked tiny.
i am about to go do some abs and maybe some more exercising, i'm a bit tired from all the cleaning.

Journaling/Posting 2/2
here i am.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
i went to an amazing presentation through the AIGA about these revolutionary designers who are freaking insane. They had people in chicken suits running around throughout the presentation and unicorns banging on gongs and lots of talk about....strange sexual acts. it was held as a talk show too. sweetness. i decided that my insanity, if channeled right, could actually be useful! their clients include microsoft and wamu, etc. CHECK THEM OUT you won't be sorry! [click on 'censored' hehehe]
www.wexley.com

-----

YES A 10/10!!! 
im so motivated, thanks everyone for your posts. chin up, go comment on some people's posts, it's really helpful believe it or not.
 

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day 9 from yesterday [21 Oct 2008|11:07pm]
day 9 | 4.0lbs | 70/90

was 152.8
now 148.8 (back up .2 i feel like i lost all my weight first 3 days and now it's not going any further down :( whyyy!!???)

Food 0/2

not good. i ate some carrots and a peice of orange all day...then at 6 my friend and i got SO hungry and went out to eat.....we ate a HUGE meal, even though it was super healthy, but we both felt we were about to explode. it would have been ok if i didn't come home and eat some ice cream and meat. what the hell.

it's too much pressure with my friend coming in 10 days....it's tooo much pressure! i don't know how to deal with it....i feel like i want to look perfect but in 10 days how perfect can you look, so i just feel like binging because he's a douchebag who doesn't deserve me stressing myself for him, but i have to keep reminding myself that i was ALREADY on the 28 day plan before i knew he was coming, i'm doing this for ME and he just happened to be coming, so need to use it as an extra boost...plus i'm doing alright and i look fine...it's just too much pressure still....

Water 1/2

i actually drank a lot but could have had more

Exercise 1/2
i walked a lot today when i didn't have to. and just painted a whole bunch. so tired and sore today =[

Journaling/Posting 2/2
here i am.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
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hellyes [19 Oct 2008|11:18pm]
i just worked out for 40 mins downstairs....there was SO MUCH ROOM DOWN THERE! WOW!

it was good times. i was dripping sweat and drinking water and freaking out and stretching.....yes. YES.

i'm thinking a grapefruit day one of these days.
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today day 8 [19 Oct 2008|09:32pm]
[ mood | determined ]

so i have to admit that i am nervous and scared for the 30th. that gives me 11 days. in 11 days it will be day 19 and..welll...in my other trial i was pretty fit by then but we will see. guh. i don't really care, this guy's actually an asshole...i mostly just want to rub in his face how damn good i look. i can do it i can do it. i hope! i wish he told me earlier, but then again, i started this a week ago so what better timing could i have had! i feel better already and am on a roll....he's not worth it if he doesn't accept my body and he's the one who will miss out anyway, cuz my curves are sexay oh yes. and whomever i marry will be a happy, happy, very happy man, that  i will make sure of. in all kinds of ways. :P time to go dance int he basement! it's almsot remodeled, we're putting in HARDWOOD FLOORS!!! so dancing will be good, i guess. maybe i'll have a salsa party! i can't wait to salsa more! maybe i'll go tomorrow.

OFFICIAL STATS
day 8 | 4.2lbs | 64/80

was 152.8
now 148.6

[i'm not weighing myself today either...too scared...want to wake up with a fresh start tomorrow without getting down on myself]
BIG NEWS:
this dude that i never thought would come to visit seattle is coming on october 30th. that means in 11 days i have to be AMAZING looking, he's the only guy ever who said something about my weight and i wanted to make sure and be really fit to rub it in his face when he came. it's funny that i started this plan for a goal of halloween without knowing he'd be here then, i guess it was some telepathic thing!! next week will be INSANE, I'M SO READY FOR THIS!

Food 0/2

so i really let go today. i'm ready to get back on track.

Water 1/2

i drank a lot but not really water. i'll catch up a bit after exercising in a bit here.

Exercise 2/2
so going to exercise after i do this, HARD. i was also painting the walls all day and my arms are sore.

Journaling/Posting 2/2
here i am.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
just yes.

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day 7 update. just to update for now [19 Oct 2008|09:08pm]

not much to say about today....my friend had a party and i went to it and didn't do too horribly but still ate some junky food.

OFFICIAL STATS:

day 7 | 4.2lbs | 57/70

was 152.8
now 148.6

[[i didn't weigh myself today because i had no time so i'm just not bothering with it]

Food 0/2
i kind of let go today, but on purpose. my friend was having a party and i ate a bunch of chips, but also a bunch of veggies and this sweet thing. i'm not giving myself any points just because i could have held myself better.....but i don't feel bad about it, because i've been feeling really great.


Water 1/2

this is for my water point from yestesrday because i ended up drinking SO much water during dance but took a point away

Exercise 1/2
i'm giving myself a point but i can't tell you why ;)

Journaling/Posting 0/2
i was busy and our all day and thinking of other things. oh well.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
we had to clean something? i'm sure i did that at some point, i've been cleaning a lot recently.

4/10 my worst day yet but i'm ok with that. next week will be INTENSE!

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catching up-day 6 [19 Oct 2008|09:07pm]
soooooooo i'm just posting to catch up, this was form friday. a great day. i had an AMAZING time dancing.....AMAZING and didn't eat my hot dog that i talk about in this post...although instead i ate a bunch of other shitty things, but it was worth it for alomost 3 hours of dancing and drinking like 4 bottles of water.

OFFICIAL STATS---
day 6

day 6 | 4.2lbs | 53/60

was 152.8
now 148.6

Food 2/2

i did awesome today.
90 cal bar in the morning
35 cal POM white tea juice- what do you guys think of POM?
around 300 cals small cup of tomato basil soup with roll
25 cals a piece of tangerine
25 cals ? plum
-----
475 so far

i will probably have a hot dog at the volleyball game i'm about to go to because that's tradition, but i've earned it!


Water 1/2

i've been doing ok today. the juice threw me off a bit. i wasn't thirsty because my mood and blah.

Exercise 2/2
So I just painted the walls for the remodel for about an hour which had me sweating, i'm going out salsa dancing tonight, so i'm going to burn a KAZILLION calories today! i'm so stoked, mostly for the hot dog i will eat with pride tonight hehehe

Journaling/Posting 2/2
here i am.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
SALSA AND VOLLEYBALL GAME HERE I COME! so stoked.

9/10 today, on a ROLL BABY!!!

--


OK SOOOOOO the big update is that one of my goals was to be under 150 at the doctors today with clothes on.
DUN DUN DUNNNNN i weighed 150.4 hahaha. Oh well, that's half a pound off. I'm pretty darn satisfied with that! She said I lost 5 pounds since my last weigh in too so that's pretty good. Can't weight (hahahah) to be HOTTTTAMUNGOUSSSSS

GOOD LUCK  EVERYONE!! HAPPY FRIDAY!!

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morning [17 Oct 2008|08:27am]
[day6 part1]
just weighed in to 148.6, 149.2 with pajamas on. i think there is hope for still reaching my goal today for weighing less than 150 at the doctor's!
SW:152.8
CW:148.6
--------
4.2 pound loss [in 6 days?]

i'm actually a bit worried about this...that's too much weight loss in such a short period of time.
maybe it's because i haven't slept barely at all this week, have been doing more school work than ever, and taking lots of salsa class?
i mean, i haven't even really done a hardcore workout by myself since day 1. well ok the auditions killed me.....

gotta go write my essay now.
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day 5 [16 Oct 2008|11:55pm]
[ mood | distressed ]

so the cool part is that i can contrast and compare the two 28 day plans i've done  and see good/bad sides. this plan is ALREADY way better. i have lost way more weight, i don't know HOW the hell that happened honestly; and i am up on my points. this is wonderful.

i feel like crap and my friend asked me to move in with her next year to an AMAZING room.....it would be a dream come true, just how do i get out of this guilt consuming me home of mine without the guilt consuming me outside of it. i'm sick of coming home and sobbing and seeing things i don't want and don't want to be. i want to be free and explore my mind and strive forever to infinity and never stop. i can't do that here. it's very nice and comfortable and i love my family to DEATH more than anything and i would give up anything for them, as i am doing now, i feel, but can't allow myself to admit of feel since that makes me feel selfish.....but i just can't be who i am and constantly feel this pressure pressue pressure of not good enough of who am i, i am wrong. but not really. at the same time my mom tries to be supportive, sometimes. she just doesn't really know how to be....

and guess what, my mother just came in and asked what's wrong and i said that it doesn't matter, because in order not to trouble her with my crying earlier i hid in my room and called lucas instead and cried to him. and to this she answers "well right, what does it matter, not like i deserve to know what happens in your life or be a part of it. and not like you care that i told you i don't feel well right now enough to come up to me and ask about it" and i couldn't believe my ears. all i did was try to spare her of my shit by hiding in my room and not complaining to her that would lead to a fight, i get her yelling at me and treating me like some sort of selfish bitch....what the hell am i supposed to do. now i feel like i need to go out there and be all sweet to her and ask what's wrong while she gives me that look and probably treats me like shit....ok i am done, i just happened to be updating to i thought i might as well post this shit like a little girl, as my mom would say if she knew i wrote this here. whatever. who the hell cares about anything anyway, life goes ON. that's what i learned nothing matters, moments matter and you have to enjoy them and that is what i intend to do, somehow...at least once i get out of this weird living thing i'm in.



day 5

day 5 | 3.4lbs | 44/50

was 152.8
now 149.4 [up .2] :(

Food 2/2

i did really good today. got home really late and so i haven't had the chance to eat anything yet and i won't because tomorrow is my big weigh in at the doctor and...as of now with clothes on i probably have not met my goal of under 150, but we will see for sure tomorrow....

Water 1/2

i forgot my water bottle so didn't really try hard enough on this one.

Exercise 2/2
salsa yayyyy good salsa day! danced with this dude that i love to dance with TWICE. that was eventful :) and the guy that i haevn't landed on so far all quarter, and found out that i was missing a lot because he was really fun and a great dancer.

Journaling/Posting 2/2
here i am.

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
i tried this new tea called HAIKU. wow did i want to write poetry after that....i know i did other new things that are more...new...but i can't think of any right now.

i was really friendly with EVERYONE today, at least before i got home. extra extra friendly. it was a great first half of the day, as the usual first half goes. sigh.

just got home and my dad made me sob for no reason at all, actually for a reason that i was being nice and offered to help. god i hate my house.
-----

9/10 today not bad!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

JULY 28th contrast between my first 28 day plan!!

day 5 | 1lb |  40/50
[this morning it definitely FINALLY lowered, although in the day i'm still at 0....]

Food 2/2 [oh man, being out of the house was super. i ate a veggie burger, a veggie skewer and one little egg roll all day! ok some berries too, but hey that's pretty damn good for me. as long as i dont eat before bed]

Water 2/2 [i tried extra hard today and finished the first liter+ in the morning, then drank all afternoon and got it down. this is silly though, there is no use to drink this much water, it's ridiculous! i had to pee every second and i didn't feel thirsty and felt weird drinking it, like torture. oh well, better than fat i guess.... ]

Exercise 2/2 [going to go dance around after updating for 30 minutes]

Journaling/Posting 2/2

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2 [going to take a shower and re-do my nails after dancing around.]

total: my first 10/10!!!!
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just looking forward [16 Oct 2008|02:23am]
wanted to see if it's possible for me to make my goal of 142 by halloween


16
17
18
19
20
21
22

2 pounds

23
24
25
26
27
28
29

2 pounds

30
31

1 pound?

-----5 pounds

now: 149-5=144

nope.
it's not possible.


whatever, i am so sleepy.
with less than 5 hours of sleep every night i doubt i'll lose weight anyway.
awkeuhrakwejhr
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:( [16 Oct 2008|02:10am]
[ mood | confused ]

i just randomly feel like crying right now and am.
at least when i hold myself i feel in control, not tonight.
my skin is disgusting on my face, what the hell.

i'm so excited for the downstairs look, we're getting hardwood floors and making the room bigger.
AND installing a surround sound system.

HELLO INSTANT WORK OUT STUDIO!!

finally i'll have some dancing space....
too bad this will be probably in another month *sigh*
hopefully i can establish a routine by then.

it's 2:15 am and i have another poster to finish but i just want to cry myself to sleep really hard for no reason.
blahekrjhalwekhjralwejkr
 



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day 4 [16 Oct 2008|12:03am]

so......i am sad. i hate arguing with men. they are so annoying. yes, THEY. some more than others. everything hurts still. it's been so long, over 3 years i think. bleh.
i'm so tired right now and i just ate an apple. i did SO GOOD during the first part of the day dammit!! I HATE LIVING HERE! 
the only thing i'm super excited for is the remodeling downstairs, i just went and took a look and it looks freaking amazing. i can't wait. maybe i can actually have people over WOAHHHHH crazy....
 

I MEAN SHIT look at the breakdown of my day! HOW DO I STOP THIS!!??

morning/day from 10am-6pm:
-chai
-90cal bar thinggie
-carrots
[THATS ALL!!!]

then when i got home:
-just ate an apple
-a pear
-some meat with sour cream this yummy dish...just a bit of it though
-bunch of creutons again
-bunch of fishy snacks again
-tea with a cookie [again too?!]
-meat pieces with cucumber

GARGGASDGHJAGD!!!

dammit 2 more posters to do tonight too...

OFFICIAL STATS-------

day 4

day 4 | 3.6lbs | 35/40

was 152.8
now 149.2 [same as yesterday]

Food 0/2

i keep binging when i get home. don't know how to stop. i eat considerably less i feel, but still can't help eating a bunch of little things as i do hmwk.

Water 2/2

still getting good at this drinking thing

Exercise 2/2
i'm using my get out of exersice free card. my calfs are SO sore and i had way too much hmwk today. although i did spend the whole morning walking around galleries downtown, that was wonderful.

Journaling/Posting 2/2
1 min to spare, almost forgot

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2

i was really friendly with EVERYONE today, at least before i got home. extra extra friendly. it was a great first half of the day, as the usual first half goes. sigh.

---

8/10 but feel yucky

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day 3 [15 Oct 2008|12:33am]

Good evening. I am feeling nice and plump, lol.
Ok, not really. I'm actually really surprised at how much better I can feel is just 3 days! 
What the hell. That's insane. Inspiring as hell of coarse.I just hope it doesn't stop. Maybe my body is in some sort of shock or something! hah.
Anyhow, I splurged a bit today because I was sore and depressed. I'll try to figure out what I ate:

Morning/afternoon [good part of the day]
-typical nut bar that i have in the morning 140 cals
-fruit cup [around 100 cals? maybe more, not sure it wasn't too big]
THAT'S ALL I HAD THIS MORNING!

then i got home at 6pm and had
-2 potstickers
-2 chocolate stick thing [170clas]
-fishy snacks a little bit
-a few creutons [we bought these amazing ones that you can eat like chips!]
-that vanilla thing with a cookie
-a little piece of meat and some lettuce

i know that looks like a lot but it was all tiny peices so it didn't feel like a lot.
still, this is my big problem at my house, eating lots of little shitty pieces of things :(
bottom heavy days....that is my new term for myself....not a good thing...it's better to spread out what you eat over ever 3 hours, or not eat so damn much all at once.
i just thank god i didnt have that ice cream, i was thinking about it.....phew! that's way too much, but i bet i was still under calories with the amount of exercise i did.

my muscles hurt SO BAD. holy crap. i can barely move. it's worst in my shin splits...can barely walk, also around my midriff for some reason.

oh i went shopping today too. i put some sexy halloween outfits on hold to try, which i will do tomorrow hopefully. they didn't have sexy nurse and i've never tried that one on and always wanted to just for kicks. i just think it would be funny if i ACTUALLY wore one of those, because i always make fun of people who wear them and they wouldn't be expecting me to. muahahaha. i think i should and go to some frat party, just because it's SO NOT ME, just to prove something to myself (ward off all the guys that try to get into my pants, but you gotta admit that's a confidence booster! why not!) and get pumped for this weight loss thing too. muahahaaa!
but i got this one tank top today that i put on and was in awe that i felt comfortable enough to buy it in order to actually wear it to dance class next time - that is my goal for tuesday, be able to wear that outfit to dance class with confidence. i've only wore loose crazy clothing, but i'm excited to be like BABAM look what i've been hiding all this time from you!! MUAHAHAH!!! i'm getting really comfortable in that class. Oh, I'm SO going dancing this week-end too, or whenever I can. CAN'T WAIT YAY!

ok i'm going to go read some more and start on my poster.


OFFICIAL STATS--------------
day 3

day 3 | 3.6lbs | 27/30

was 152.8
now 149.2 [although this was this morning and after all the crap i just ate probably went up....we'll see in the morning.]

Food 0/2

i had a wonderful first half of the day but then i got home and got really depressed and ate a lot of things randomly throughout the night, culminating in a french vanilla drink with a cookie that i just had. :(

Water 2/2

i'm getting good at this drinking thing

Exercise 2/2
i'm glad i have my 2 hour salsa class on t/th, that's an automatic 2 points. plus i was running all around campus. i am SO FREAKING SORE from yesterday, it's been a while since i was this sore. i'm hoping it goes away soon because i can barely move and just passed out because i was so tired and sore :(

Journaling/Posting 2/2
i know i'm a bit late but i had to take a phone call and was ready to post, it doesn't count!

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
been catching up on my book, i read a whole bunch. READ IT! it's called Ubik by Phillip K Dick who wrote the books Blade Runner and Minority Report were based on. He's a crazy mofo i tell you!
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morning [14 Oct 2008|09:56am]
149.2 this morning.
yummy.
had a bar so far and a bottle of water.
very sore today!

have a good day everyone!
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day 2 hell yes hell yes hell yes. [13 Oct 2008|11:16pm]
[ mood | tired ]

i'm feeling really good, this is very promising! mostly because this time i really don't have a huge goal date, and halloween is just kind of a goal date, not a specific someone i have to do this for, just myself. eeeeeeee maybe this will work!!

this kind of start is just WAY inspiring....i didn't expect to be in the 140s until next week, but LOOK AT MEEEEE.
the scale said 149.8 in just a freakin day. DRINK WATER PEOPLE, see what happens!? water weight bye bye.

i think my goal will be to be under 150 with my clothes on for friday's appointment. like 148, but 149 would be fine too, just under!

the best thing is that i am taking salsa dancing class, an actual hardcore one when they teach you stuff, two days a week...and once i start slimming up i will want to go out and dance in the evenings, adding wonderful exercise that will keep me motivated. maybe that's why i'm doing this, to not feel HUGE when i dance with all the guys in class. i want them to WANT to dance with me, not be like oh, that girl. although i'm not the fattest one in the class, shit i'm not even fat or anything, just big boned! hehe! i feel that my curves are sexy and if i didn't have them i'd lose all my sex appeal, who wants that, pshh. i think i'm entertaining to dance with to say the least, i am very comfortable with my dancing self at the moment, but it's going to get harder and i want to be READY!

woooooooooooooooooooo i have no more to say, gotta go do some work before bed.

--------------------OFFICIAL STUFF

Day 2 :)

day 2 | 2lbs [how is that possible....???] | 19/20

Food 2/2

wow i did amazing today!
all i had was:
-bar for breakfast- 140
-humbow for dinner- i can't find calorie amount for this ANYWHERE! i'm guessing...300 maybe, dunno.
-half a protein shake after my audition- 110

Water 2/2

oh. my. good. ness. i drank my weight in water today. dammmm. this is probably why i lost 2 pound in the last day- water weight! whatever, i'm stoked :) at this rate....halloween will be easy!

Exercise 2/2
TWO HOUR DANCE AUDITION BABY! IT WAS HARDCORE! ok i know i did horrible, but i didn't care and just freaked out and gave them my best and had a laugh :P it was a wonderful workout. i sprained my toe and back a little but not too badly.

Journaling/Posting 2/2

Daily Self Esteem Challenge 2/2
oh man. i just took a loooooong shower to make sure and relax my muscles. then i lotioned my feet because they were sooo tired from bare-foot dancing.

MY FIRST TEN!!! YESSSS!! 
onwards....
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